Boundaries: An Important Life Skill

Setting boundaries and honoring boundaries is an important life skill. Early experiences with poor, non-existent, or inconsistent boundary-setting lead many to ignore inner sensations and knowing. If an important life skill is rarely or never modeled well, it easily becomes a skill deficit that has great impact on a persons experiences later in life.

You CAN trust that what is right for you will feel right.

We always have a choice to get ‘unstuck’; to leave a job or a relationship, set a limit, say “no,” or move away from a situation, location, person, or substance for our higher good. Often, a boundary is necessary to gain greater clarity of how we feel or see a situation from another perspective. Good communication skills help with this process. Likely, communication skills are also lacking for various reasons if you are struggling with setting boundaries or consistently crossing them. Setting boundaries is a skill that takes practice, so be patient with yourself.

Setting limits within your inner circle

Friends, family, colleagues may have significant struggles and benefit from your love and support; however, it’s important to recognize when you are being pulled into situations that are detrimental to your well-being. Sometimes your appropriate limit setting is the action that helps another reflect more honestly on their own ‘drama ‘ or experience. Choose to be at peace with setting reasonable limits and know that by practicing this important life skill, you are helping others close to you to set healthy boundaries.  

When boundaries need strengthening

When our values and actions align with each other, we will experience feelings of inner peace. A compromise or loss of integrity may be notably experienced through unpleasant shifts emotionally and physically. Sometimes it is not until this shift is felt that the compromise is recognized.

Important Life Skill
Setting Boundaries Before Lines Are Crossed

When adjustments to bring back the balance are made, somatic symptoms may dissipate or disappear, and more peaceful, pleasant feelings may replace negative emotions. However, staying true to your values does NOT negate resistance or equate to an easy path. There is a saying, “Do what is right, not what is easy.” The path of refusing to have your values compromised will likely not be easy, but it WILL be worth it!

Boundaries convey respect and are an effective tool when in conflict

Dignity comes not from control but from knowing who you are and taking your rightful place in the world. You alone have the wisdom and power to know what is true for you personally. The most effective way to validate your truth (without being baited into conflict) is by keeping your focus there. No explanation is needed. Embody your truth and allow others to embody theirs. Read more “The Most Potent Form of Communication is Embodying Your Truth.”

Boundaries convey self-respect and respect for others to make their own choices. Take comfort in knowing that you have control of yourself, your choices, and your decisions. Let go of fear and any need to impose ‘your will’ outside of yourself. Drop inward and align with your inner compass. Read more “How to Trust Yourself by Finding Your Inner Compass.” Do this often. You will gain confidence in your ability to TRUST yourself and be liberated from the illusion that you can control others’ beliefs/opinions or outside circumstances. This path leads to true empowerment and maintains the dignity of all people.

For more information and supportive services to help you develop this most important life skill of boundary setting, please visit my Coaching Services or Metaphysical Services (Spiritual Tools 101). Wishing you much growth, healing, empowerment, and peace as you work toward taking greater self-mastery

Estelle Bonaceto
Share the love: