If you’re wondering how to stay grounded during December and ease holiday stress, mindful holidays invite us to appreciate what we have and release pressures to overconsume. More, bigger, better is an insecure energy — an unfillable hole that steals holiday joy. Holiday stress relief may be as easy as shifting one’s perspective from imposed expectations to embracing a mindful simplicity.
Enough is not resignation. It’s comfort, peace and presence. The energy of enough deepens appreciation and opens flow, so more of what was lacking while focused on want or perceived need comes through your gratitude for all that already is.
Why Holiday Stress Hits So Hard (and How Mindful Holidays Help)
Why are the holidays so stressful? In part, holiday stress comes from “doing” in ways that don’t align with what holds value or meaning to us. If you desire a stress-free holiday season, embrace the energy of enough by withdrawing your energy and attention from what drains you. This can be done by regularly checking inward to enhance your sensitivity and awareness of what is sapping your energy.
It’s possible that too much all at once is the reason that a beloved holiday activity has morphed into something you’d prefer to skip all together. If we overconsume, and overdo the complexities of the holiday season become burdensome instead of joyful. Mindful holidays help us to know when less is more.
Remember decisions are best made, one precious, mindful moment at a time.
Overconsumption Ignited by Holiday Stress
While light displays, traditional meals and modest gift-giving can be some of the most treasured aspects of the season, the push for more can derail feel good holiday vibes. Tendencies to overcompensate, even the ones that usually lie dormant, are stirred awake by holiday campaigns intentionally designed to spur consumption. The energy of overdoing is insidiously encouraged and celebrated. It can make you add a tray of lasagna to accompany your full roast dinner or question the enoughness of stocking stuffers, incomplete without the addition of gift certificates too. Will it be enough?
Commercial holiday pressures, convey the message that too much is never enough. Traditions get overshadowed by the glut. Spending beyond one’s means is commonplace and done under the awareness that it compromises more than one’s bottom line. Messaging that suggests: “It’s just not the holidays without it!”, is the bait that lures even the frugal into entertaining the superfluous.
What drives seasonal spending frenzies, a perverse overconsumption and the energy of never enough is multi-layered.
Holiday spending reminds me of Shel Silverstein’s poem Hungry Mungry. It begins like this:
Hungry Mungry sat at supper,
Took his knife and spoon and fork,
Ate a bowl of mushroom soup, ate a slice of roasted pork,
Ate a dozen stewed tomatoes, twenty-seven deviled eggs,
Fifteen shrimps, nine baked potatoes,
Thirty-two fried chicken legs,
A shank of lamb, a boiled ham,
Two bowls of grits, some black-eyed peas,
Four chocolate shakes, eight angel cakes,
Nine custard pies with Muenster cheese,
Ten pots of tea, and after he
Had eaten all that he was able,
He poured some broth on the tablecloth
And ate the kitchen table.
If you’re familiar with this iconic poem, then you know he remains unsatisfied until everything is gone, including himself. Perhaps the comparison of Hungry Mundry to holiday consumption is a stretch, and maybe outside influences are unlikely to catapult you into a gluttony of overconsumption. However, observation and life experience tell me that sensing the energy of enough comes during a fast, not the overflow.
The Role of Neurochemicals
Neurochemicals play a significant role during times of holiday stress. What are quick dopamine fixes? Shopping, sugar, alcohol, social media and more! They’ll give you momentary relief from seasonal expectations, but after this brief reprieve you’ll find yourself lower than before AND the cycle continues. In the attached video, the dopamine expert, Dr Anna Lembke, Professor of Psychiatry at Stanford University and author of bestselling books such as, ‘Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence’, talks about dopamine’s role in addictive behaviors.
This neurochemical loop is one reason holiday stress relief can feel so elusive.
The addictive nature of attempting to fill the desire for something meaningful through superficial means, is pronounced and profited off of during the holiday season.
The Role of Emotional Memories
While it’s true that many of us have warm and fond memories that surface as the holidays approach, it’s also true that for most of us it’s an emotional mixed bag. Recollection of familial conflict, trauma and lack sometimes rise during the very moments we expect to feel joy. Celebrations may feel bittersweet in recognition of the absence of a loved one. These are parts of the human experience that offer opportunities to remember that life is sacred. This remembering brings us gently back to enough.
Unrealistic Expectations
Many of us carry old programs that convince us we’ll be judged as a Scrooge or holiday Grinch if we choose what we want instead of what others expect. How long have conditioned expectations imposed their ‘must-do, must-have-more’ energy upon you?
Limiting beliefs that drive unrealistic expectations about the holidays affect our choices, actions, and presence. I suspect those closest to you, those who really matter, would be happy, perhaps elated by holiday boundaries that simplify the season. After all, it truly is our joyful, contented, peaceful presence that holds value to those we love and beyond.
Create Space for Rest, Boundaries, and Emotional Honesty
Recognize when you’re making emotional and energetic sacrifices. Be honest about how the holidays are influencing your energy. Healthy holiday boundaries help us embody the energy of enough instead of being a frazzled, drained, holiday-stressed parent, partner or friend.
Holiday Self-Care Tips:
- Honor personal energy levels.
- Give yourself permission to decline invitations.
- Name grief, loneliness, burnout, or sensory overload.
- Accept what comes up at any given moment without forcing “holiday cheer”.
When you feel overwhelmed by holiday demands (emotional or financial) allow yourself compassion. There is a lot of messaging that suggests you should do it all, but don’t. Set boundaries with family, kids and around your own expectations. You honor the season when you honor your own needs for rest.
Choose what is of value – decide where you most wish to place your attention.
The “Energy for Today” Check-in
- What do I have energy for?
- What can I let go of?
- What would feel nourishing instead of draining?
- Choose authenticity over performance and make grounded check-ins. Ask yourself “Am I chasing approval?
These simple questions reconnect you to your experience of the present moment rather than the energy of obligation. Quality over quantity means less holiday anxieties, greater ease, and contentment; elevated feeling states of joy and love.
Mindful Holidays: How to Make Them Meaningful
The more aligned you are with your authenticity, the less fulfillment you’ll experience participating in activities that are only superficially meaningful.
Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. — Bart Simpson, “The Simpsons”
You may ask yourself, “How do I make the holidays meaningful again?” I suspect the answer to this question is deductive, letting go of expectation, and simplifying. Within a mindful moment, our senses fine-tune and we may begin to look at the world with fresh eyes. Meaning may then be found in small details previously overlooked. How precious tiny footprints in the snow remind you there’s a whole sacred world of creatures outside. Maybe you take notice of a familiar stranger following their own tradition, like placing plastic candy canes down the side of their driveway like they’ve done every year you’ve driven by and it makes you smile.
Like so many things, meaning is not something that is decided upon by an outside entity. It’s personal.
Focus on Connection Over Perfection
- Shift from trying to be impressive to practicing a pause, stopping when it feels right
- Set honest intentions around what truly matters
- Recognize when you’re “performing” to please or to be enough for outside observers
- Consider decorating simply, with family or friends with holiday decorations that are nostalgic, homemade or just your style
- Simplify meals, recruit help
- Approach holiday activities as an act of joy rather than another chore
What Brings You Joy and Excitement?
The greatest measure of the season is how it makes you feel. This is a slogan I recently heard during a car commercial. It’s intended to rouse an emotional sense that the manufacturer cares about your personal well-being. While that is a marketing ploy, the message is valid and helpful when applied to oneself in earnest. How do aspects of the holiday actually make you feel, as opposed to how you think they’re supposed to make you feel?
I was preparing what I refer to as candy coffee this morning, holiday-flavored with real cream and sugar. My eyes fell upon the half-eaten tray of gingerbread brownies that I’d eaten late last night with leftover cream cheese frosting. When I say they were good, I mean they are mouthwatering, moist nuggets of holiday stress relief goodness. My habits are healthy. I had more than my share of yummy in a short period of time. Did my brownie breakfast give me joy and excitement? I believe it did.
I could view this indulgent “breakfast” as drug seeking and I certainly have a propensity toward sugar addiction; however, gingerbread and candy coffee are seasonal. These simple treats, enjoyed with awareness of their small luxury, bring joy.
How to Simplify the Holidays and Reduce Stress
Simplifying holiday traditions doesn’t diminish meaning — it amplifies it.
Reduce Holiday Spending Pressure With Conscious Choices
- Think about the kinds of experiences you’d enjoy
- Remember presence is better than a present
- Find joy in acts of service, shoveling snow or simply holding space
- Consider making handwritten letters, cards, or handmade gifts instead of buying off of Amazon
For simple, budget-friendly winter activities, along with gift-giving ideas, have a look at last years article: 5 Fulfilling Winter Activities on a Budget.
The Energy of Enough: A Mindful Shift for a Stress-Free Holiday Season
Setting healthy holiday boundaries is one of the most powerful ways to reduce holiday stress, offering you better control of your time and finances. It aligns you with your most heartfelt intentions, a sacred claiming that allows for a mindful shift toward higher truths. As a result, resistance (stress) softens, and new perspectives illuminate the energy of enough.
Imagine carrying the knowing of yourself as sacred into the holiday season. This shift alone invites ease, presence, and joy.
If you feel called to explore the energy of enough — not through doing more, but through remembering your own sacred presence — I’d love to support you. You’re welcome to reach out for mindful guidance, spiritual coaching, or deeper holiday grounding. You can contact me directly. You don’t have to navigate this season in overdrive.
May your awareness that you are, have, and give enough bring more peace, less stress, and a fuller sense of presence throughout the holidays.
Sincerest Holiday Blessings,
